Get the Facts...

Excuses for Abuse

Excuses. People who are abusive in a dating relationship use excuses all the time to justify their hurtful behavior. People who hear them may start doubting whether their concerns about the relationship are valid, and they'll put up with the abuse.

Have you heard these excuses before?

  • "It's not abuse."
  • "I was having a bad day."
  • "Jealousy is a normal part of any relationship."
  • "You got me upset or angry."
  • "It just happened once. It won't happen again."
  • "You deserved it."
  • "I was drunk or high. Drugs made me do it."
  • "I had a bad childhood."
  • "I deserve your trust, even if I messed up before."
  • "I deserve unconditional love and support."
  • "I should be more important than your friends."
  • "My needs are more important than yours."
  • "I didn't mean to hurt you."

Any of these sound familiar? These are signs of an unhealthy relationship. There is no excuse for abuse-excuses should not be tolerated! Abuse is always a choice. While some people will choose respect, others will choose abuse.

When you hear excuses like these, confront your dating partner about them. Or seek help from your friends or trusted adults, like your parents, about what you should do.